What happens when you’re too tired, or too lazy, to put any effort into SHOWING UP CONFIDENTLY?
You already know the answer. I dare say, when I don’t make the effort to look put-together, I not only feel invisible, I actually want to BE invisible. I’m not likely to introduce myself as an image stylist because at the time I’m not looking my best, and I’ve lost an opportunity that I’ll never get back! Who knows what opportunities you may be passing up by not making the effort to show up confidently every day?
I hear this all the time from women, “But, Linda, I’m retired so I don’t have to look good anymore.” REALLY????? So that means you never go out to lunch or have date nights or travel or volunteer for causes you care deeply about?
Let’s be honest. The real reason you don’t SHOW UP anymore is that you don’t know how to show up. Your body has changed so much over the years that you don’t know what looks good anymore. You hate to shop because everything is either too short, too revealing, or not your style. Your closet is filled with clothes that you don’t wear because they don’t fit, aren’t the right color, or don’t fit into your lifestyle anymore.
There are 3 things you can do right now, today, to get out of your comfort zone and start exploring your greatness. I’ve got some strategies to help you SHOW UP CONFIDENTLY this summer, feel good about yourself, and rediscover your style mojo…
SHOW UP Tip #1: Do Not Leave The House Without At Least 2-3 Accessories
I remind women all the time that they have the secret to looking put-together right in their bedroom — they’re just not utilizing it! Every woman has a box or drawer (or cabinet) full of jewelry. By the time you reach 50 you’ve accumulated quite a collection of jewelry. Whether you insist on wearing real gold or precious stones, or you love the glam of chunky, costume jewelry, you have everything you need to add pizzazz to your tee shirt and jeans outfit. Layer it on, sister!!
Other accessories you can use to look put-together:
- Colorful shoes
- Artsy handbag
- Funky hat
- Interesting eyewear (cat-eye or round)
- Scarf (around your neck, used as a belt, or tied on to your purse)
- Colorful manicure/pedicure
Note: I will be offering a FREE Webinar in August that covers how to accessorize in more detail…stay tuned!
SHOW UP Tip #2: Use A Color Wheel To Create Interesting Color Combinations
Did you ever take an art class? Did the teacher show you how to use a color wheel to mix paint colors? If you haven’t explored your artistic/creative side, this might be something to add to your bucket list! Anyway, image stylists use the color wheel to create appealing outfits. Above is a color wheel — notice that when you pair “complementary” or opposite colors you get powerful combinations. Watch out!! When you pair complementary colors, such as green and red, blue and orange, or yellow and purple, you will get noticed — you will SHOW UP! If you want to tone down the POW factor, use one of the complementary colors in an accessory, such as a handbag or shoes.
Go into your closet and put together a complementary color outfit. See what happens…how did you feel?
Note: I will be offering a FREE Webinar in August that covers how to use a color wheel to create gorgeous color combinations!
SHOW UP Tip #3: Be Aware Of What Your Body Language Says
This is the summer of WONDER WOMAN!! We can all take a lesson from her legendary confident power. If you’ve never listened to Amy Cuddy’s TED Talk, “Your Body Language May Shape Who You Are,” I highly recommend it. Basically, this social psychologist argues that changing your body language influences your brain function (thoughts and feelings), and a power pose can actually make you feel more confident!
As women, in general we are physically smaller, and we tend to pull in whatever stature we have to appear smaller. We make neat little piles of stuff, whereas a man spreads out. I notice that in my house, I make an effort to put away my things and my husband loves to cover every surface area with his stuff — so he can find it more easily he tells me.
Women are trained to keep our legs together, to fold our feet, make ourselves smaller. And, many women slouch, scrunching down to be smaller, so as not to take up too much space.
The key, as Amy Cuddy argues, to increasing your physical presence and confidence is to stand up straighter, take up more space, and hold a power pose for several minutes before entering a room. The way we hold our bodies actually influences brain chemistry! So stand tall ladies!!
WARNING: Do not power pose in front of a group!!! Do it in the privacy of a bathroom stall or your bedroom before entering a room full of people. Then enter the room and report back to me how it made you feel. Did you SHOW UP more powerfully?
BOTTOM LINE: Tiny tweaks can lead to big changes.